The children are also loving life there. The days are filled with riding bikes, swimming and playing at parks.
T has turned from a child who had no clue how to pedal a bicycle (in which I had to hand over hand move his feet for a few days to get his brain to figure out how to make his feet move in circles to push the pedals) to riding a bicycle fast without training wheels. This is a difficult time for him as he adjusts to learning how to live 'in' a family and 'testing' to see if I will stop loving him. I admit I falter a lot with this child. I understand that he is suffering much loss and is confused over no longer seeing his first family. His whining drives me bonkers as does whining in general. I am working on it but need lots of prayer in this department. He goes out of his way to start fights with CO and then gets upset when CO lashes out in anger at him. So it is a lot of adjusting for all. T gets very jealous if I give someone else a compliment and not him, even if he has just treated me terribly and has done nothing to deserve a compliment. I struggle. He gets jealous of everything. It is hard. He could have 10 of something and then 5 minutes later another child could have their first of the same thing and he gets upset as he didn't get one too at that time. So much of his behaviour around food points to him having known hunger. I ask him. He doesn't remember or he just isn't ready to open up about that part of his life.
Life at the cottage is also easier because there is nothing there that reminds him of his first family. He knows where they live. So when we travel around at home, he is watching for them. It is sad. We actually ran into a member of his first family and it was awful. The man ignored him. How do you explain to a little kid that rejection? Life at the cottage is easier because they have the freedom to go and play and he hovers around me less. I need chunks of time in my day where someone isn't touching me, hovering around me and watching my every move. Life at the cottage is easier because I have a village. A group of people that support me. That will spend some time with T so that I can get a break. It is lovely. When we are at the cottage I hardly hear his wailing. He seems happier there. It may all be in my head because I am happier there.
CO is adjusting to life. He likes knowing that these kids will stay forever. He still misses J a lot. He has regressed in the fact that he is resorting to using actions before words when dealing with confrontation with T. If T won't play with him, he will hit him. There is a lot of hitting going on these days and the harshest punishment that I have discovered is writing lines. I know SO odd. But both boys detest it and they get to write out phrases like 'God made me to love' and 'God created me to be gentle'. Next up will be scripture.
B is coming along. We actually have moments now where she will stop eating. So that is really progress. Her struggles with drinking have disappeared completely.
Right now we have company up. This is our second batch of company in the last couple of weeks. Once this company leaves, we are headed back to our oasis.
I will add photos later.
Night it is WAY past my bedtime and I am going to regret it come 6 am as the boys do not seem to sleep in at home...at the cottage they don't stir before 730! and they are asleep earlier at night. Go Figure?!?!?!?
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