verdict...

So, the verdict was happy & sad. I will be able to adopt my two foster children, but their younger brother will be adopted separately.
It is great news that these kids get to stay and they no longer have to move around. The little boy has had 4 moves in less than a year. I was sad that CAS didn't even give me a chance to show them I could parent all the kids. I was sad that the three bio siblings will not be able to grow up together as siblings. I felt that they ripped me off from my chance of having a 'baby'.
But of course God talked to me in the middle of the night...as he tends to do. I guess that is when he has my undivided attention the most.
Yes I could have successfully parented 4 kids ages 5 & under. But I will be able to parent 3 probably a little better. God doesn't give me anything I can't handle. I admit, 4 would have been a stretch...especially the first year.
The loop hole of this all is the family who adopts the baby has to be open to contact. So, if they are really amazing, I could be getting an extended family...more family...
CAS is choosing between 2 different families. One who sounds nice and already has a couple of open adoptions.

SO...

things aren't official until the 27th.
Then there is a 6 month probation period.

But I am unofficially the forever mom of 3. And am unofficially DONE with the foster system. I will no longer foster. I think I will also close my house for future adoptions. God may change things in the future....

 

 

 

I have written the CAS a letter asking for a chance to raise all the kids so that the sibling set can stay together. I am not holding my breath but years from now when the kids ask my why I didn't raise their brother, I will be able to answer that I was not allowed even though I was willing.